The disease of addiction and its impact not only on the individual but on that individual’s community is one of the most taboo topics in our country today. Whether it is due to lack of knowledge of addiction, confusion on how to treat the disease, or the degree of normalization/rationalization in our society, the conversation is long overdue. Substance use disorder (the clinical term for drug addiction) can cause a strain on the family unit due to emotional damage, as well as financial, legal, medical, and other consequences that can typically originate in addiction. 

The “ripple effect” of addiction is similar to throwing a rock into a lake and watching how far the effects from that rock affect the water. Now imagine throwing a boulder into a pond and watching the waves crash back down - that's how addiction impacts a family. The impact of this disease can have both short-term and long-term effects on those around. Trust within the family slowly falls apart, conflict becomes the norm, and communication becomes more difficult. These are signs of a dysfunctional family - triangulation, picking sides and sympathy seeking. Triangulation is a term associated with family theory in psychology created by Murray Bowen, in which a two-person relationship that is unhealthy and unstable turns their focus and attention to a third person to attempt to balance conflict or intimacy and provide stability. Picking sides is closely associated with triangulation as well, in which one of the parties involved may feel pressured to choose a side. Sympathy seeking is exactly how it sounds where either the addict or another member of the family uses excessive or inappropriate behaviors to gain sympathy from others. This attention seeking habit can also be addictive. 

Those who are struggling with addiction may believe that their behavior  only impacts themselves, since they are inflicting it upon themselves, but addictive behaviors and patterns impact those around them even if they are not aware of it. The best option for a family member of someone struggling with an addiction is to also seek help for themselves - whether it’s in the form of counseling and/or attending a support group. It;s important to not suffer in silence or just to enable the behavior of a loved one.

Start here - Al-Anon Family Groups